Gophers Roll, Indy Wins Because It’s Not The Playoffs, NBA Wagers
Friday, November 3rd 2006(McCulloch)

Get the checkbooks out sports gamblers. Take the debit cards from the wallet. If you’re a fearful football gambler, you now have the National Basketball Association on which to place your bets. Like the golf clubs disappearing into the basement in the Northeast, David Stern’s boys reappear from summers spent playing international hoops to fulfill all your wagering needs. Yes, basketball gambling on the plate every night.

Do not immediately sense the sarcasm in my voice. Wait another week before you’ve fallen in love with an NBA team favored by 11 and up by 10 with 20 seconds to go and they let the new ball hang around the hip and handshakes are exchanged as your four-team parlay disappears into the Costa Rican night.

NBA basketball -- not the safest place to put your trust fund set up by your grandfather who loved football, if you ask me. I prefer to put my kid’s diaper money on college kids who are drug tested rather than NBA players who can take bong hits with impunity on the mornings of big games. Moreover, the college football racket, with all its BCS backlash, has created an environment where teams will cover spreads and get to the over.

So while I watch anxiously as Mr.Thomas and Steve Francis hug, Kobe’s team plays great without him and the local Warriors falter again, I will bet, but with a certain degree of restraint. Eighty-two games is a lot to care. I’ll take the important ones.

READER MAIL
My main man Marc sent me a fabulous email from down south, a week before his team fell to Oregon State. “You suck, Floyd sucks, and Dr. Bob really sucks. Go back to the East Coast you clown, where you and Floyd can circle jerk each other with your Eagle and Patriot jerseys on. USC rules. Chargers rule. Cal will always suck.”

PICKS OF THE WEEK
Indiana at Minnesota (-6)
Dr. Bob’s analysis of this game speaks to the Gophers’ fondness for running up the score on crappy teams. And is there a worse program than Indiana – traditionally? The Hoosiers, coming off a win over Michigan St., are 5-4, but don’t let the record deceive you. Minnesota took it on the chin in a 44-0 loss to Ohio State. They’ll have red-ass this week. I like the Gophers at home in the Dome.

Prediction: Minnesota 28, Indiana 17

MY NFL PICK
I’m tempted to fire on my New England Patriots this weekend. They’re 3-point favorites at home against the Indianapolis Colts. If you’re trying to decide which team to fire on, consider a personal question: Is this a big game? Both teams are going to make the playoffs, both teams are going to win their division, right?
But is this a big game? If it’s a big game in your mind, bet on the Patriots. Tom Brady wins big games that matter. Remember every big game against the Colts and remember the 1999 Orange Bowl over Alabama. Peyton Manning? Great quarterback, great career, but like Floyd says, he doesn’t win the big game.

This isn’t a big game. Bill and the boys will save their best for the playoffs.

Prediction: Indianapolis 27, Patriots 21

FLOYD GOES TO TAHOE
After Floyd takes his best friends out to dinner on Ryan Howard’s ability to hit the most home runs in major-league baseball, he’s going to the California and Nevada border with some fellow loopers. Belgium Greg will walk into the sportsbook and immediately fire on the New York Giants. Arnie will bet on the horses all day and Floyd will try to fight back the temptation to bet on college basketball futures while the college football games linger on the board.

Floyd might fire s a few online gambling bets before he leaves, but he goes back to his roots. Good luck old friend.

VACATION
I didn’t bet last week. Like Skunker T. Floyd who celebrated his birthday, I took my bye week and tried to consider how much money I saved. Floyd actually liked the 49ers to cover in Chicago. “I think Alex Smith is going to have a good game,” he said as he left my house after a few cold ones.

One of the reasons I did abstain was that a week before I was burned by none other than UCLA, which didn’t play like Pac-10 patsies in South Bend. Notre Dame didn’t cover. On that Sunday, my losing continued when the Chargers and their juiced-up defense couldn’t cover in Kansas City. So my 8-1-1 record is now 8-3-1.

We get back on the horse this weekend, literally. I’ll take Lawyer Ron in the Breeder’s Cup

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